Strange

Last night I had a very weird dream. I dreamt I was strapped to a chair and there were like a thousand nuns in front of me praying for me in unison. One nun stood next to me and kept saying "sufre" over and over. This is weird in a couple of ways. First, I'm not now nor have I ever been Catholic. Second, I don't speak any Spanish at all. I wasn't even 100% sure what "sufre" meant until I looked it up. So that was weird.
Then I woke up with this horrible pain in my stomach. I had a lot of shit to do today at work, so I painfully got dressed and went in. I spent the first five hours of my work day hunched over at my computer putting together quite possibly my shittiest paper yet (and that includes the paper where I wrote the woman who was having her 100th birthday was celebrating a "decade." Yep...I'm a genius like that.) Then I decided I should probably go to the doctor.
I explained to the doctor that the pain wasn't really a sick feeling, but more like a physical pain. He poked and prodded and then came to the conclusion that he needed to check me for a hernia. Ah, nothing like having your balls cupped by a dude. In one of those "as long as you're down there" kinda things, I asked him to check out the scrotal abomination that is my third testicle. His exact words were, "wow...that's definitely not normal. If not checked out, this could get bad." So he wants me to come in next week to set up a biopsy. Hm. I'm not too sure about having something jabbed into my balls.
So the dream coupled with the stomach stuff (turned out to be a virus, but apparently not the 24-hour kind since I'm still pretty sick) kinda freaked me out. Ladies, better send me those boob pictures now. I could be on my way out. At least the fictional nuns think so.