I have to share seven random things about myself. I'm not very interesting, but here goes. I'm even going to include pictures like she did to zazz it up a little.
1. First and foremost, possibly the source of my super powers...the third ball. Testicle, if you will. I'm kinda like a bizarro Lance Armstrong. It's been there as long as I can remember. A doctor looked at it when I was in sixth grade. Well, he said he was a doctor. Doctors drive windowless vans and don't wear shirts, right? He said it probably wasn't anything to worry about. That was a long time ago and I'm still alive, so I guess he was right. Either that or cancer has been festering inside my sack all these years. Who knows...I just wish he would have at least called me afterwards. I read somewhere that I should check myself often to make sure no more abnormalities develop. I'm pretty sure none have developed. I've been "checking myself" since I was like 13.
2. I've always wanted to keep bees. I'm not really sure why since I'm not particularly fond of getting stung and I think honey tastes like sticky shit. I just like the idea of it, I guess. Bees, not sticky shit.
(Amanda, is this us? It's amazing the random shit you can find on the internet. This doesn't look like the Buzz I came to know and love. )3. Speaking of shit, if I had one super power, it would be the ability to make others shit themselves with my MIND! I was getting mildly chewed out by a boss the other night at work and my only thought at the time was, "man, I wish I could make her shit herself right now." It just seems like it would be a problem solver. Also hilarious.
4. If I could always be drunk, I think I would. I don't really have anything else to add to that.
5. I'm a sucker for Goth girls. Not like the drink your blood ones, but the slightly Goth ones. There's just something about a girl who is paler than me.
6. I bludgeoned a homeless man to death in Austin back in '91.
I'm kidding, I'm kidding. (It was El Paso.)
(I don't have a picture for that one.)
7. I made a new blog. It's here.
Well, that's it. Hopefully at least one of those was interesting. If not, just watch the lady pooping in the hot tub again.
4 comments:
This was just as I imagined it would be lol. Good work plumpy guy.
Okay, you're slowly worming your way into my heart. How did you know I was goth??? You get me DB, you really do.
GBC - Thanks. I didn't want to let you down. I'll eventually write a post that doesn't mention poop or my penis.
IG - Why must you toy with my emotions?
Because it's so easy. I like easy, DB. Oh yes I do.
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